Sex Sells


With more comments on the past posts than ever before, I guess we can conclude that it really is true:  sex sells!

To keep the theme going (don’t panic, last posting on this subject for a while), here are two somewhat contrasting quotes on a topic in every teenagers’ mind:  “How far is too far?”

“It is indeed difficult to set up hard and fast rules regarding premarital sexual involvement since many factors enter into the situation, such as the person’s age and maturity, the level of their commitment, the length of engagement, and the closeness to the marriage ceremony.”  Jack and Judy Balswick, The Family

“I disagree with those who make virginity a technicality.  Such people say that so long as two people don’t actually have sexual intercourse they are all right.  I say that God’s concern for virginity is not a matter of anatomy but of privacy.  He wants people to reserve our “private parts” for their marriage partner alone.  Only in marriage ought two people to be naked and unashamed, as Adam and Eve were.  When two people touch each other’s sexual organs, I believe they are doing what is appropriate for married people alone.”  Tim Stafford, Worth the Wait.



~ by Dave Smith on February 25, 2008.

6 Responses to “Sex Sells”

  1. I line up more with quote one but only because I think quote 2 stinks a little bit of legalistic tendencies, not because I advocate pushing the boundaries as far as can be pushed. Plus, I’m not sure “being naked and unashamed” is as directly related to having sex as Stafford seems to suggest in this brief quote. I’d need to know a little more about his exegesis and hermeneutical moves to say for sure, though. He’s obviously assuming a literalist interpretation of Genesis (which I would want to tweak), and he seems to be implying that one of the primary concerns of the passage is sexuality — and I’m not convinced of that.

    Again, I don’t think we need more “wait until you’re married” theologies, and I don’t think we need to legislate “how far is too far.” I think those questions can be worked out naturally if we develop and advocate a deeper theology of sexuality built around the Scriptural concept of covenant. In other words, I think the focus is in the wrong place. The question should not be, “how far is too far?” But rather, “how is my relationship constituted with this other person?”

    Obviously, I have assumed a certain level of emotional and relational maturity up to this point, and the question concerns teenagers — not always the beacon of maturity we would hope for. In such cases, boundaries might need to be spelled out somewhat more explicitly but never arbitrarily. Boundaries should be the natural outworking of a covenantal approach to relationalality and sexuality. If we are preaching abstinence to our teens arbitrarily, they will see right through it because they are smarter than we often give them credit for. What is needed is an alternative to pop-culture’s approach to relationships and sex, and this alternative should be much more than rigid rules about abstinence from activity X, Y, or Z.

  2. If it wiggles, don’t touch it.

    If it jiggles, don’t touch it.

    If you don’t have one, don’t touch it.

  3. my hands wiggle & jiggle…am i not allowed to shake someone’s hand?

    i agree with BG that this is a wrong-ended question. the question “how far is too far” is also very selfish. it makes intimacy & sexuality become about me and how i feel instead of being equally about the other person. beyond that, it strips away the purpose of relationships as reflective of God’s glory. if we’re just trying to get away with as much as possible, what does that say about what we’re ultimately desiring?

  4. You crack me up Rich! Very funny, as I am never going to shake Joel’s hand again knowing that it now jiggles and wiggles on a consistent basis. (Where has his hands been?!)

    Joel/Ben, great observation. Taking a further step and examining the question is excellent. In his book, “A Call TO Die” David Nasser addressing this issue stating that a question like this is asking “How much can I get away with?”…versus “How can I best glorify God?”

    As I really like what he says…at the same time, when dealing with say, a high schooler, to get them to change such a psrpective is easier said than done.

    Winner also brings up this point in her book, “Real Sex” but then realizes she needs to answer it at some level because of who we are in the flesh, needing to know boundaries and limits.

    Ben….when are you getting married?

  5. June 14. At the Chapel.

  6. if you forced me to draw lines, i think i’d be very subjective. it’s the postmodern in me.

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